How can I trust my own energy when it seems so much has gone wrong in my life?
It’s not a mental thing. It’s a surrender.
Compiled by Carolina Oquendo
Q – Dear Master, I recently realized that there’s still a lack of trust deep within myself. While on the surface I know (and I’ve heard you say) that the basis of energy serving me is trusting myself, deep down I still believe that I will be betrayed: by my body, by society, by this harsh world; in short, by my own energy. How can I finally leave that fear behind me?
I can hardly teach trust. I just can hardly do it. I can say the words. We can have some trust Merabhs and all the rest of that, but if you don’t trust yourself, you don’t trust yourself.
A lot of things in your life won’t have to happen if you trust yourself. If you absolutely emphatically “I’ve got nothing else in my life” trust yourself, it will change the experience.
Trust is kind of a surrender, in a way… trust, for some of the Masters, has been, “I don’t have anything else. There’s nothing left. That’s all I have. I can’t even effort into it. I can’t make myself believe in, but that’s all I have because everything else is gone.” That’s when you discover real trust, by the way.
Q – That sounds fine I guess, but could you give me some practical pointers that will help me understand trust? How can I go beyond this lack of trust?
The mind loves to have order, make everything neat, make sense out of things, because you believe that if there is sense, that you’re safe. But good lord – not. Not!
There is no safety in sense – mental sense – none at all. Haven’t you found that out by now? That’s only confusion, chaos, running in circles, chasing the rabbit down the hole and frustration.
So, you breathe in.
Go into your intuition, your gnost, rather than relying on the old functions of the mind, and that can be frightening. It takes a huge leap of trust in yourself to do that, with the mind trying to hold back saying, “No, you have to be logical.”
Q – But it’s like we’re going in circles. That internal voice is still afraid of letting go, and doubts that anything good will come from trusting. Is there a way to shut it down?
When you encounter doubt as you go beyond the box – and, again, we’re not building bigger boxes (…) we are blowing through, going out of the box – and you approach that critical point like stepping out of the airplane, (…) of coming to the edge of the cliff (…) where you feel the anxiety within you and you have to take a deep breath and you feel doubt trying to pull you back (…) that’s the moment you take a deep breath and you feel into the communication, the energy of what is already within you.
But if you’re not feeling safe (…) you’re going to be constantly frustrated with yourself, constantly wondering why it’s taking so long (…) wondering when I’m going to give you the big answer that’s going to solve all the problems.
It’s about feeling safe in an unsafe reality (…) realizing the games that have been played to try to make reality safe.
Q – You have talked a lot about creating a safe space, yet this planet feels anything but safe. How can I feel safe in this very unsafe world?
One could say theoretically that a Master is safe wherever they are. Well, that’s kind of crap. It really is. A Master recognizes they might be unsafe. A Master recognizes that in this extreme reality called Earth there are a lot of unsafe things.
It’s not safe in there. Not safe with the mortar and all the bricks of your consciousness with things like guilt and shame, loathing, judgment.
Take a look, a conscious look at safety, just to recognize and to realize that here you are, a divine being surrounded by things that are kind of unsafe – your body, your mind.
But, my dear friend, what if those walls came down (…) What if beyond these old walls and bricks of consciousness was the true freedom of the I Am, even in an unsafe world, but no longer unsafe within yourself.
Safety within Self comes when one forgives themself.
What forgiveness in mastery is, is wisdom.
That’s the safe space. It’s not a little room in a big house. It’s not a little thought that you can run back to and try to repeat to yourself. It’s a feeling. It’s a reality. It’s a knowingness. It’s the safety.
It’s actually tapping into your own wisdom. That’s it. Tapping into the “I exist.” That’s it. (…) The wisdom that you are divine; the wisdom that you exist. That’s the core wisdom, from which all other wisdoms come – “I exist.”
It’s not even a mental thing at this point (…). It’s an inherent, it’s an innate trust. It’s – I’m going to call it – a righteousness within yourself, because you know it’s right.