ink and feather pen on beige background


ink and feather pen on beige background


Let’s talk about control

Compiled by Carolina Oquendo

Q – Dear Master, you’ve always emphasized that allowing is the key to everything. It’s been on my mind lately and I realized that it means letting go of everything, even things that I hold onto dearly like my identity. It seems that I must be willing to lose everything.  Would you expand on that?

If you just stop for a moment and allow, like FM did in the last days of his life; like Tobias, my dear buddy, did in the last few days of his life. They reached a situation where all else had failed. They had nothing else. FM with the cancer; Tobias, rotting away in prison. And when you don’t have anything else – you have nothing left to hold on to anymore, not even yourself, no body, no money, no family, no health, no nothing – well, it’s pretty easy to allow then, and that’s what they did. 

And in that allowing, in the total letting go, getting out of the mind and stop trying to control and regulate everything and stop trying to figure out your way to heaven, he let go and he realized, “Oh, my God – which is me – oh, my God, it was there all along. 1

In simpler terms, does letting go, allowing, and even receiving mean giving up the control I’ve tried to have in my life? I realize that everything I do is motivated by a desire for some level of control, whether to achieve or avoid certain results, but am I not supposed to manage my life? 

When you’re trying to figure it all out, like you need to still be in control of everything, well, it’s that very control and that very limited logic that’s gotten you into the bind that you’ve felt yourself in, the limitations. 2

This is not the time right now to be trying to manage or manipulate anything in your life.

You all know how to worry a lot and to fret. You all know how to try to control things. You all have had great battles within your mind and with other people, but now let’s stop all that. 

When you’re feeling angry or even depressed, don’t try to fight it or overcome it. Not at all. Just allow. 3

So, if I’m still feeling that things are not flowing, if I still feel stuck in some areas of my life, does it mean that I haven’t really allowed?

You think about allowing, (…), “Oh, I’m allowing. I’m just going to sit here and allow,” but you’re not. You’re still holding on to all the stuff you were holding on before

You’re playing a game, and I’m going to call you on it. That’s bullshit. And you know it and I know it, now we can laugh about it, right?

When you’re constantly complaining and whining, you’re out of alignment. So that’s exactly what you’re going to get

Reality follows consciousness. 

Reality follows even limited consciousness and beliefs. It’ll create it for you, and that’s what you get. 4

You have the I Am, but you have the little me, the selfish human. I don’t say that disparagingly. I don’t say that negatively, but it’s there, and it tends to try to take control. It whines enough and rebels enough and distorts you enough. You fall in. You become, in a way, a victim to little me. 

No more. No more. No more. 

Let’s be mature I Am beings. No more selfish little human, bratty, insisting on its trivial little ways. You’re the I Am, so start acting it. 5  

It seems like the only way to really let go is to keep observing me, every hour and every minute, instead of storing a problem in my indifference pocket, running from it, fighting with it or, even worse, criticizing myself for still being stuck with it. In other words, being constantly in touch with what I’m thinking. And then, eventually, the consciousness shifts. Is that enough?

You can’t fight it. You cannot overcome your thoughts. You can “and.” 

You can go beyond, saying, “You know, okay, Adamus said that all my thoughts are crap and I’m going to go over here to the point where they’re not. I don’t need the self-judgment, the self-criticism.” 

Take a deep breath and “and” it. 

You say, “Yeah, it’s part of me. Wow! Amazing. Interesting. And I’m over here. I don’t need that. It doesn’t get me anywhere. That’s just a part of me, an expression of me, but it’s not all of me.6

When I’ve had glimpses of that AND you talk about, there’s a part of me that gets paralyzed by fear, and I feel an internal recoil, as if I were tightening the reins, so to speak. What’s up with that? I mean, how can I trust something that’s out of control?

To change from a mental way of experiencing life into a sensual way is huge! It’s frightening. Just think about it for a moment – or don’t – suddenly, the mind isn’t controlling. Suddenly, nothing’s in control. 

And on top of that, there’s almost a fear of sensuality, meaning feeling, the ability to sense, the ability to feel something outside of the mind. 7

There’s a general fear of it, because in real sensuality there is no central control. The mind is not controlling it. The human’s not controlling it. The Master is not controlling it. It is free flowing, as sensualness should be. 

So there’s a fear, “Who’s controlling this? Where is it coming from? Is it a dark evil force? Am I ready for it? Can I handle it?” That’s where you take that deep breath and you realize, “Here goes that mind again with all of its thing,” and you come back to you. You come back to the “I Am, I Exist” and just let it happen. It’s that allowing that I constantly talk about. 8

Just take a deep breath and let go. And then watch what happens. (…) you come to the “I Am Here.” You’re just there. “I am beyond the need for self-control.” Then you’re there. 9

It comes back naturally. There’s not a thing you have to do. I just want you to sit here and behold what happens. That’s all. Just observe it, behold it, but get out of the way. 10

Adapted from:

Walk On Series: Shoud 2, Shoud 9 // Transhuman Series: Shoud 5, Shoud 6 // Emergence Series: Shoud 8 // Passion 2020 series: Shoud 5 // Merlin I Am series: Shoud 6 // Art of Benching series: Shoud 5

  1. Art of Benching, Shoud 5 ↩︎
  2. Merlin I Am, Shoud 6 ↩︎
  3. Passion 2020, shoud 5 ↩︎
  4. Art of benching, Shoud 5 ↩︎
  5. Walk On, Shoud 2 ↩︎
  6. Walk On, SHoud 9 ↩︎
  7. Transhuman, Shoud 5 ↩︎
  8. Transhuman, Shoud 5 ↩︎
  9. Transhuman, Shoud 6 ↩︎
  10. Emergence, Shoud 8 ↩︎


  1. Como siempre Adamus constantemente nos hace un recorrido a través de todas sus enseñanzas, lo cual lo resumo para mi vida así:
    No aferrarme a nada como la salud, el dinero, es cuando permito, suelto, salgo de mi mente y descubro la sabiduría, la sensualidad de mi vida.
    Dejo de buscar y simplemente recibo ese manantial de sabiduría que ahí está. Es esto Auto-consciencia? Si
    Quejarme ante mi misma solo me lleva a seguir en el juego de lo que me estoy quejando. Para que jugar más? Para que seguir en el mismo estado de consciencia?. Es esto Auto egocentrismo? Si
    “Vuelve al “Yo soy, existo” y dejas que suceda”: es el campo oscuro? Si
    Ni el humano con su mente ni el maestro con su sabiduría controla porque la vida es sensualidad en flujo constante
    Gracias por recordarme quien soy

  2. Danuse Mitchell

    I really like to read your compilations Carolina …. 👍❤️
    It’s always something in it also for me …. 🌺

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