AI artwork by Marc Ritter

My Chalice Runneth Over

By Alaya Holman

Adamus’ lead-in question to the audience during Shoud Nine of the ALT Series was, “It’s been a little while since Heaven’s Cross. How has your life been on a scale of one to ten in terms of gracefulness?”

My mind-gears started to review four significant events: Heaven’s Cross and the introduction of the chalice of the soul; the realization of being a Realm Worker for the past forty-plus years and shining my light in the bowels of mass consciousness; being one of the Beyond-the-Beyond Shaumbra attendees at the first Masters Circle four-day event at Villa Ahmyo in Kona, Hawaii; and stirring up ancestral karma energies during an extended stay in Hilo on the Big Island while exploring my mother’s maternal family’s history from the early 1900s. 

On a sliding scale of ten to one, I came up with: ten, at first; six, on the average; and ground zero for the month of May. “Ground zero?” you may ask. With an accumulation of the above experiences, please allow me to explain….

My mother and I returned to Colorado from our visit to Hilo and the Big Island toward the end of April. During the first week of May, I started to feel gravely ill, and my daughter took me to an Urgent Care Clinic. I was diagnosed with a UTI (urinary tract infection) and was prescribed oral antibiotics. A few days later, my symptoms escalated, culminating in an emergency ambulance ride to the hospital where I was diagnosed with something far more sinister: sepsis, a life-threatening condition caused by an overwhelming immune response to infection. Specifically, I had a severe e. coli blood infection.

As my body lay in the hospital, I felt like I was having a mini Kuthumi-type collapse. The doctors and nurses attentively fought to save my life, their efforts guided by the knowledge and experience of modern medicine. My loved ones continued their vigil, unaware of the profound journey that was unfolding within me. Embarking on an extraordinary passage through vast expanses of consciousness, beyond the confines of my physical being, I found myself contemplating whether to stay or transition.

Through this journey, I began to understand the delicate balance between the physical and spiritual aspects of life. The body is merely a vessel for the soul to experience this earthly reality. And true healing and growth come from nurturing the communication with the soul. I became deeply aware of my dedication to being a Realm Worker and how I “owned the culmination of these experiences as my own.” Although I did not consciously know the specifics of the realm work and ancestral karma that I had embarked upon, I realized that the events did not belong to me and turned them all over to the chalice of my soul. With an enormous number of experiences being dumped into my chalice, it became clogged up and overflowed into my physical body as a poisonous infection.

Multiple realms had been unveiled during the Heaven’s Cross ceremony on March 22nd, and now I was able to understand the true nature of existence and the interconnectedness of all things. I found my soul in a realm of ethereal light, where knowledge and wisdom permeated every atom. With wonder and curiosity, I delved deeper into the mysteries of the universe and explored the boundless realms of consciousness. I witnessed the intricate dance of energy, the symphony of thoughts and emotions that interconnect all living beings. I learned that at the core of every existence was a spark of divinity, universal consciousness, and that gravity binds physical objects into changeable manifestations. 

With infusions of fluids and potent antibiotics pumped into my body, the infection slowly started to purge. I started to regain consciousness and my vital signs stabilized as my body responded to the treatments. I felt a newfound sense of peace and clarity. The wisdom that I had gained in the realm of higher consciousness infused my being where the infection had resided, giving me strength and a clearer sense of purpose. 

After the medical tests concluded that the infection was no longer evident in my body, I was discharged from my four-day stay in the hospital. For the next fourteen days, I was an out-patient receiving a daily potent antibiotic infusion treatment to ensure that the infection would not return. During that time, and for weeks later, I was exhausted, empty, unenthusiastic, goalless, and in a place of the void. And….I allowed the New Light to come forth within me.

My experience reminds me that there is more to life than what meets my reflections. And that, beneath and beyond the surface of our physical existence, there lies a vast realm of consciousness waiting to be explored. And sometimes, in the depths of our darkest moments, we find the brightest light, guiding us to new heights of understanding and compassion for self and others.



  • Alaya Holman

    Alaya’s awakening began in the late 1970s. She draws upon her life experiences, and as a returned Realm Worker, to inspire others as they explore their individual realms of consciousness. She discovered Crimson Circle in 2009 and currently volunteers during in-person events at the Crimson Circle Connection Center in Louisville, Colorado.


16 thoughts on “MY CHALICE RUNNETH OVER”

  1. Yay Alaya!

    I am so happy you chose to stay, and that I had the pleasure of being with you (in Hawaii) during the more joyful parts of (what turned out to be) a harrowing Spring for you.

    I must say, though, the line about your chalice getting clogged-up had me laughing TOO hard to be TOO solemn!

    Here’s to going beyond, and shining our lights for ourselves! Hugs! 😘

  2. Wonderful sharing Alaya !
    It resonates a lot with me
    Fine line between human perception and soul perception

  3. Thank you for sharing your journey in – out of the void and beyond. And you stayed. Y e s ! H e r e w i t h u s 🙂

  4. Людмила Нужная

    Алая восхищаюсь твоей историй.Спасибо что рассказала.

  5. Merci pour ce beau témoignage. Et merci pour le partage. Je vis également des moments intenses et perturbants depuis l’ouverture de la croix du ciel.

  6. “And true healing and growth come from nurturing the communication with the soul.”
    Yes thank you for this Alaya, and your beautiful sharing; – it becomes more evident each day how sacred is that communication. Deep gratitude and compassion for your journey.

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