✨AI Generated

This is Why

A lot of parts and pieces of my story have fallen into place over these last 20-some years. The constant searching unrest, the burning desire to understand “why,” the dismay at never-ending religious discrepancies, the all-too-human attributes of “God,” the suspicion that I actually DO have a say in the choreography of my life – all this and more has been answered, fulfilled, and laid to rest. Life makes sense now. I know from whence I come, why I’m here and where I’m going – and not because some ‘authority’ told me so.  The knowing is as real to me as my experience of this day.

It’s been an incredible journey, but like any grand saga, there have been pitfalls, traumas, misdirections, and disasters on the way to the grand finale. When I first listened to Atlantis Rising (now part of the Wound of Isis series), I remember being awed and horrified at the stories Tobias told of the times in Atlantis. They struck a very deep chord in me; I knew I’d been there, and my very cells were remembering both the wonder and the agony. 

Over the years, Atlantis became a common topic with Tobias and Adamus. I gradually collected more and more pieces of my story, along with the inevitable awareness that some of those old lifetimes weren’t always on the “right” side of history. During one of the sessions in Threshold, Adamus finally spelled out what I had begun to grimly suspect: it was us – me and my beloved Shaumbra friends – who created the headbands in Atlantis, bringing about helpful change but also too many dreadful consequences. And we’re back now, trying to make things right because of the guilt we still carry. I remember going outside to be alone after recording that session, barely able to breathe. He said it clearly, “Your wounds, your guilt from times long ago are bigger than most human’s.”

It all came up again when Adamus talked about Hapiru in the October Shoud. This is not some fanciful story of a faraway place long, long ago. It’s our story. It’s MY story. I am Hapiru, and I’ve fought those righteous battles with as much passion, conviction, and oblivion as anyone. The problem is, they are battles. Power is seductive, revenge always beckons, and the impossible “rebalancing” of an eye for an eye simply never ends. Even now, writing this I must ask, am I fighting for the wars to end? Am I battling the battles?

It’s a daunting question.

What I know is that nothing resembling the past will help, only wisdom. 

In a dream a couple nights ago, I was at the war in Israel. I wasn’t a human on the ground, but rather “above” the melee, no doubt one of many entities offering presence and assistance. In the dream I noticed some very strange beings. They were black, roundish, globby-looking humanoid things, perched as if on a scaffold or viewing platform overlooking the battle, and were singularly occupied with keeping it going. If a human “on the ground” took a pause to wonder about the violence in which they were engaging, these beings would poke at them in some way, goading them to keep fighting. Intent on never allowing a moment for reflection or inner questioning, these strange beings were equally active on both sides of the conflict. 

✨AI Generated

They were fixated on the scene, aware of very little besides sustaining the fight, like poking at the coals of a fire to keep it burning. As I became aware of them, they paused, staring at me with empty, malevolent eyes of darkness and reactivity. I felt them waiting, almost daring me to do something, anything, to which they would then respond with yet another blast in the human realm. They didn’t really care what was actually happening on the ground, only that the “fire” continued to burn. I looked back at them with a steady neutral gaze. Nothing happened. Like a cat with nothing to chase when the mouse doesn’t move, I didn’t try to stop or change what they were doing, so they had nothing to react to. A flicker of confusion crossed their strange bulbous faces, and I woke up. 

Those beings are also Hapiru. Neither evil nor good, they are simply living out the family pattern, unaware that it’s an old, tired game that’s getting nowhere. Stuck on repeat, oblivious to consequences, they were only primitively conscious of their actions. Like children jabbing at an anthill, entertained by keeping the ants in a frenzy; if the action ever slowed, another poke was all that’s needed. 

A few days before writing this, I returned from a perfectly wonderful 10-day vacation. I visited family, made new friends, immersed in nature, and enjoyed the disconnection from my routine and the world’s problems. 

A couple of the new friends are 2 and 5 years old, and I got to engage with their innocence and wonder, as well as their penchant for drama. When a child becomes fixated on a forbidden object or dangerous activity, a good parent learns to distract them with something new and interesting, rather than punish or struggle against the child’s desire. I happily watched as dad didn’t bat an eye at the toddler’s screams, simply offering another toy or activity to draw their attention. 

✨AI Generated

And now the penny drops. 

Could it be that the solution to all this war and trauma is… distraction? Hunkered down in darkness, those clueless angels know only the repetition of what they’ve been doing for eons. But when a light comes on, bright new potentials might capture their attention. 

Ending the wars is not about finally winning – or convincing or overpowering or reasoning or any other form of duality. It’s about offering a brand new experience, one so beautiful and enticing that the weapons are dropped, and the fight is forgotten. It works; I watched it happen again and again between the kids. (I also saw how trying to use reason or power just made them scream louder.)

Those nonphysical beings stuck on autopilot are nothing more than childish angels who have yet to earn their wisdom. They’re like tired and cranky two-year-olds, fixated on the one thing they know how to do – bashing on the anthill for the little rush of drama that feeds them. Like toddlers, they don’t yet know what wonders await when they finally turn away from the game. But we do. 

THIS is why joy is revolutionary. THIS is why it’s critically important to live our best life right now. THIS is why, dear Shaumbra, guilt and suffering must go. It’s time to offer something new to our sibling angels who are still playing in the dark. They are going to love life as much as we do – if only we show them how magnificent it is.

This is not the time to play dumb and clueless, acting as if we still don’t “get it.” We are the ones who got fed up, said, “No more” and created Earth to figure it out – and we have. Now it’s time to step out of the lab back into reality – our true reality where nothing hurts or dies – and dangle a bright, shiny new life in front of the rug rats. It’s not about changing the frenzied fighting ants; they – our beloved fellow humans – really do want to return to peace and order. And it’s not about taking away the toddlers’ poking sticks or putting them in timeout. It’s about saying, “Hey, look over here! See what I found!”

Shine bright, play hard, love deeply, dear Shaumbra. Give up the shame and fear, because it’s the bright and shiny treasures of your joyful life that are changing everything.


  • Jean Tinder

    As Crimson Circle’s Content Manager, Jean is fulfilling her life-long dream to shine her light in the world. On a spiritual journey since childhood, she found Crimson Circle in 2002, joined the staff in 2008 and never looked back. Her first book is called “Stories from My Last Lifetime”.



  1. You said it perfectly! And that is why Adamus encourages us to stay on the planet. I will read this article whenever I feel I want to leave. Thank you

  2. What a great article Jean… Soooo accurate 🙂 Since the beginnings of October I’m on my quest to Joy – so many things are finally letting go, dissolving, coming to an end (= wisdom and integration). I’m also letting go my urge to leave. And perhaps, perhaps (?) it is closely connected with the collective Decision to finally stop Hapiru wars that’ve hurt us all so much.

  3. Dragon here digging up the last residu of guilt. Stuck in my teeth. Time to let go no matter how deep ingrained. Time for joy!
    Thanks for sharing.

    1. Dear Jean, thank you for this beautiful text. That’s right! I would like to say that this week I also had many dreams similar to yours and when I was waking up I received a clear message: “The game is over, understand. A new Sun rises”! And here we go, in pure joy! 😃✨🧙

  4. Oh, what a wonderful observation, Jean! It reminds me of a quote by Kurt Tucholsky that touched me deeply many years ago (without my mind really getting it):

    It is a great mistake to believe that humanity’s problems will be “solved”. They will be left behind by a bored humanity.

  5. BRAVO Jean!
    your words are a great reminder for me!
    and I hope they find their way to those who need them right now…!
    thank you!;-)

  6. Zoé cifuentes (YISHANA)

    Many synchronicities in your dream, your experience with children and this moment of shining our light. This reminds me of The Art of Benching • Shoud 1:

    “Deep down, everything returns to zero, to the center. It’s just a starting point. You are returning to your own consciousness. That is Park Benching, shining its light.
    You are back in your own consciousness, in your own home, in your own energy, these things will simply go away, without you having to focus on them…”

    “It is just light. But in that is everything. In that is all the potentials”.

  7. Danuse Mitchell

    Yes Yes and Yes dear Jean and I would like to add to it a refrain of one of my songs:


    Great article…. thank you ….💗

  8. Dear Jean,

    thank you for this elegant explanation on why it’s important for us to shine and be in our joy. I really enjoyed the analogy and the reminder of why we are here!

  9. This whole November issue is, unsurprisingly and of course, perfectly timely, beautiful and love-filled. And also unsurprisingly and of course – and as usual – your article is the perfect end piece. From my whole heart, thank you, bless you, love you ❤️❤️❤️

  10. Gabriele Fleuchaus

    Dear Jean, thank you so much for your clarity and wonderful reminder of how to keep going. Inspiring as usual!!!

  11. Close, yet not there Jeanne. Distraction won’t work, for war and darkness are a great experience for the soul. It remains a beautiful and very tough game. Running from darkness will not work, understanding will. Shine your light AND shine your darkness. Don’t run from darkness Shaumbra, don’t run from it. For Darkness is indeed your divinity.

      1. What Tucholsky said will work, what Jeanne said will not. The one is deep understanding followed by wisdom, the other is distraction and therefore a running away. And as James Taylor sings it, you can run but you cannot hide, this is widely known…
        Boredom implies a lot of understanding. If the dualistic game gets boring then you got it. It’s over. For this you have to deeply know darkness. Jeanne is very close to understanding darkness, but not there yet. We share the same past, I know her for a long time, deep inside she knows the fear I am talking about.

  12. “Look over here!” I love it. There are enough fellow humans ready to understand the darkness when we shine our light.

  13. Hi Josef, I didn’t understand that we should enjoy our lives IN ORDER TO distract the warriors. It’s because we’re only here to enjoy our lives anyway – there’s nothing else left for us to do at this point. And that’s why we should simply stop delaying it with any excuses right now, because then – as a wonderful side effect of our sheer joy – the warriors might also be distracted from their war games because they find our new games much more fun.

  14. Dear Jean,
    your image of “Hapiru-Angels = Toddlers” is exactly what I needed to understand all of this war business. What Adamus told us was important – but there was no image I could cling to.

    So: thank you very much for your sharing.

    Now I KNOW WHY I/we have to stay here and shine my/our light = live our life in all its aspects: To show these Child-Angels something better that the old-old wornout ways! I had still this image in me of Angels as grand wise beings, and your sharing showed me the fact that these unexperienced Angels are really like children (what a strange thought: really old beings without a bit of wisdom…).

    Hugs from my heart
    Loving my Life in Germany

  15. Thank you dear soul for putting into words my many thoughts this writing does add. to my JOY . With love , Shaumbra in Texas

  16. I so much love reading your monthly articles Jean however this one is so apt , so full of brilliance …. and the rest …. I love your style of writing

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